My brother-in-law Mark lost his job last week. Like any other weekday, he arrived at his office at 8:25am, likely scanning his Blackberry on his walk across the parking lot to see what his busy schedule held for him. But instead of a day filled with meetings and customer calls, he was promptly ushered into a conference room, sat down by an HR rep, and summarily laid off. Thanks much, but we just don’t need you anymore. To Mark, the sudden loss was devastating—and not just for economic reasons. He loved that job. His view of who he is as a man was largely defined by that role—a vision scratched out forever by an accountant’s pen.

Mark is certainly not unique in his outlook. It’s common for a man to define himself in terms of what he does in his profession. I think of times when I introduce myself to a man at church or a social event. We will say our names to each other, and then the conversation inevitably turns to a mutual exchange of And what do you do?

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